You might think that would mean a human being.
Oh no, my friends.
I have received my birthday gift from my mother.
Meet Hilda. She's my new food processor.
I love her. She also rocks.
From Williams Sonoma:
Completely redesigned with an array of exciting features and a larger capacity, this kitchen workhorse represents the next generation of Cuisinart food processors. The machine’s powerful 1,000-watt motor allows for effortless slicing, chopping, shredding, mixing, and kneading. Three separate nesting bowls (16-cup, 13-cup and 41⁄2-cup cap.) can be switched out instantly to reduce downtime while processing different ingredients. Designed to handle liquids more efficiently than ever, a seal-tight gasket between bowls and lid prevents liquids from spilling while the machine is in use, and locking blades stay put while you’re pouring out ingredients. Redesigned adjustable slicing discs provide customizable control over size and thickness when you’re chopping and slicing, and the reversible shredding disc allows you to quickly grate thick or thin shreds of ingredients. For clutter-free counters, the power cord retracts and a storage box safely holds all blades and discs. The rugged die-cast metal housing ensures longevity and reliability through years of daily use, and the large electronic touch-pad buttons are easy to clean. Includes three bowls, two discs, two chopping blades, a dough blade, accessory storage case, spatula, how-to DVD and recipes.
Let's just hope I don't look like this after getting to know her better.